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In Love With Food
Sunday, April 30, 2006

I have finally admitted to myself that I have an obsession with food. It is something that is tough to admit because we are taught that all obsessions and addictions are wrong. Plus when I think of other addictions, such as alcohol, drugs, and gambling, food seems so innocuous.

Then I really think about it. Is an addiction to food innocuous? Well, the answer is no. Food is good in many ways. It provides us with sustenance. It helps us to grow strong and to be healthy. It even sits with us as we talk to old friends or meet a new lover.

The bad side of food, though, can be dark. It also sits with us at night when we pine away our lives being sad about the state of affairs. It is there when we feel terrible for already being overweight. It is there when we need something to pick us up or something to allow us to wallow in self-doubt.

And that is when eating becomes a problem.

I am overweight, and I never thought that I would be at this point in my life. I have gained a good deal of weight over the past three years, and I am struggling with what to do about it. Only over the past couple of months have I noticed that I do, indeed, eat when I am not hungry. I do eat when I feel bad. I do eat good foods, like mashed potatoes and bread, when I am feeling blue. I am not sure that I can stop this obsession with food, but I know that I must.

The reason food is so dangerous as an addiction is because it can kill you. We think of the danger that alcohol and drugs cause to the body, but food is the same. The effects are blamed on heart attacks or strokes or whatever other health problems we have, but the underlying reason is the food we are eating. We are a nation making ourselves unhealthy with our poor food choices, but we are unwilling or unable to admit it.

Unlike the people in groups like Overeaters Anonymous, I do not believe that my obsession with food is beyond my control. I do not believe that it is something that I have to fight to give up forever. It simply is something that I have to change about my life.

I love food, and I do not want that to change. I just want to change the kind of food I love so that I can add to the joy in my life with food instead of taking away from it. I am going to begin by using the Sonoma diet plan to bring healthier foods back into my life. There was a time when I was very healthy. I ate well, and I enjoyed it. Over time, however, that eating has given way to foods that are not so healthy. I have stocked my cabinet with foods that I know are not good for me because they are easy to make or because I can grab and eat them without thinking.

Now I am going to make an effort to have a good number of healthy foods available for snacking. I can have fresh fruits and veggies. I also can have granola bars available and trail mix that I have made instead of brownies and cheese crackers.

And I am not going to deny myself the possibility of ever eating those brownies or cheese crackers. Doing that would defeat the purpose in my mind. I want to be able to choose what I eat and to know that I can choose to eat something that is not healthy once and then go back to my normal routine. I believe I can do that and that food can once again become my friend.
I have decided that I am going to begin with my next shopping trip. I am going to toss the bad stuff and begin anew with the good foods that I enjoy. Instead of stocking up on junk foods, I will fill my cabinets and my refrigerator with the good stuff, and it will be worth it in the end.

By Julia Mercer

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