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Prize-Winning Pumpkins
Monday, September 26, 2005

Something amazing happened in my town this weekend. Just a few miles down the road from my house is an unassuming farm and produce stand. But for a few hours last Saturday, it was the home of the biggest pumpkins in the state. The Great Lakes Commonwealth Giant Pumpkin Weigh-Off Contest was the source of all these amazing specimens of squash, pumpkin, and even a bit of watermelon.

The winning pumpkin weighed in at an astounding 1,199 pounds. This might sound like an impressive number, and it was a new state record, but its owner was actually hoping for a bit more heft. He really wanted to beat the world pumpkin record, currently set at 1,337 pound, nine ounces. But that's okay; there's always next year. And the next year of growing such an impressive pumpkin will begin soon enough when he cuts open this year's winning pumpkin to collect the seeds. After all, it stands to reason that the seeds of a champion pumpkin contain the proper genetic material for growing a future prize-winner.

Unfortunately, such large pumpkins are pretty much only good for display purposes and bragging rights. The varieties of pumpkin that have the greatest potential to reach award-winning weights don't have a very good flavor or texture. I guess you have to sacrifice something in the name of so much growing power. So this weekend's top pumpkin won't be making dozens of delicious pies or 500 loaves of pumpkin bread. Instead, it's going to be displayed in a park during the month of October. Maybe they'll carve it. Can you imagine what a jack o'lantern that would be?

But pumpkins weren't the only impressive vegetables on display this weekend. The award-winning squash of the day weighed 1,018 pounds, yet another new state record from the same event. Even though they don't quite fit in with the otherwise squash-based theme, watermelons were also included in the festivities because of their propensity to grow to unusual sizes. Although the winning watermelon's weight was nothing compared to the weight of the pumpkins and squash, it still weighed in at a hefty 158 pounds. There was no word on whether large pumpkins suffer the same inedible curse of the pumpkins.

I find this whole enterprise quite impressive. I'll admit that like many kids, I was fascinated by the Guinness Book of World Records and could look through its pages for hours reading about the world's longest fingernails, the world's fattest man and so on. So I think these pumpkins appeal to the same part of me who marvels at any record-breaking feat. But I also think the pumpkins and squash were particularly impressive because the gardeners had to work with so many unknown factors. While they have perfected techniques such as leaving at least 25 feet of room for such a pumpkin to grow and watering it with up to a gallon of water each day, there's an amount of luck against the elements and the forces of nature. What if a passing animal had thought the prize-winning pumpkin looked tasty or a storm had separated it from the vine, cutting off its growing prematurely? It just adds an extra bit of wonder to my consideration of this contest. I wish I could have seen all the competitors rolling into town. I can only imagine what a thousand pound squash on a flatbed looks like.

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